White Western Power Vs the world

 

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Do we live in strange times, where white supremacist are trying to take over our world, or have they always been there but we didn’t notice them?

Since the 18 century, we have lived in a world run by them, and in the 21st century, we can see that things have not changed much. Yes, we had the illusion of shift to peace and equality. But it is not reality as the ones who got us to live in that illusion are indeed white.

They have made us live in a world of entertainment, where justice wins and prejudice loses, and the worst part is that unfortunately, we all believed it. And now that the minorities seem to have a voice we are back to reality. Wake up that was entertainment; the magical world, the illusion of the perfect world. In reality, white has always been in power even with the small reality of having a Black president in the United States now we are back to Klux Klux Clan fans. But even with a black president, there was always injustice towards black people in the US.

The conservative party in the United Kingdom has been in power for a long time, and the injustice to see a black prime minister one day is a reality, as white is still in power. Even though in the UK the entertainment business shows an integration of minority people, however, Brexit has shown a different image. As having Eastern European, ex-communist is the worst thing that can happen to the United Kingdom.  Remember being a communist was as bad as being a Jew or black at the mid-20th century and now we can see the same with Muslims. So the white ex European who have enslaved and colonized are the one who should always be in power.

Lately, we saw a huge rise of right-wing government in Europe as  France, Netherland and now Austria is going through this conservative believes, and anti-immigration mainly. But can someone please remind them how they got that rich if it is not by killing, raping and stealing from the ancestors of those immigrants. And unfortunately, their countries have been politically damaged after the colonization by these same people who now are refusing them.

And in the 21 century, we can see that superiority even in the terminology used by the white people shows their superiority, so if a white South African, Australian or New Zealander move to any country in order to work he or she is labelled as “ExPat”. However, any non-white person from the same countries will be labelled “immigrants”. Please, can someone explain to me this unfairness, if I am a black South African I am not in the same terminology then the white South African even though we grew up in the same country?

So I think, white power has not died out, not yet anyway. And if there is any way how to stop that is by uniting and giving power to those who have been robbed of it, I hope it is time that Africa, South America and Asia will lead their own destiny and provide enough in their countries that no one will feel obliged to walk and escape to the white  western world in order to find a job. Africa has the resources that wealthy countries are still taking advantages of, when would the gold and diamonds be sold in order to give power to Africans I wonder?

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Stress of Modern life……

 

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The seasons keep changing, the sun keep rising and the life keeps going. That is the beauty of our world, where beautiful things happen daily beyond our knowledge and we don’t seem to appreciate them.

All we do is complain, we complain about what we don’t have, we complain that we need more space, we need a bigger house, we  need more money, we need good schools …..all those needs that are imposed by a greedy society who makes us always want more, therefore complain more, and that means work more and all that  in order to have what we wanted, but once we have it; we will still want more……greed is part of our nature but in this scenario our nature has been very well exploited by  the advertisers and the media.

They make us feel unhappy by what we have, and sell us the fantasy of short happiness if we buy more, and unfortunately this vicious circle is grained in our unconscious since birth in the 21st century.

Saying that I am as a victim as everyone else as I want a bigger space than one bedroom flat in East London, I want my daughter to have her own room and better education than what this part of the world can offer. So I am not writing this to say that I am a saint, but in contrary, I am wtiting this about  how we are all victims of wanting more. I am so struggling with the idea that I cannot provide enough for my daughter that I am getting epileptic fits due to the stress level  that I put upon myself.

So instead of being a good parent by my standards and not the society standards, instead of thinking positive and that my daughter is lucky to have a home and parents who will do their best for her wellbeing I rather stress and have fits about it.

So the question now is what to do? How to change my thoughts about this need of more…..I don’t consider myself a materialistic person, but I am generally happy with what I have, and that has changed since I became a mother. So it is natural behavior or not?

If it is up to me and my husband we are happy to carry on living in one bedroom flat if we don’t have Maya, and if it is up to him he can live here with Maya, but it is me who wants more for her, so is that greed or being a provider?

Please let me know your thoughts?

 

 

 

 

RECOGNIZE EMOTIONS

via Daily Prompt: Recognize

I am going through an experiment suggested by my therapist, and it is mind blowing. I am trying to recognize every feeling I am going through.

First I think I should explain about the reason of this experiment , well I am epileptic, and this disease can vary from one person to another, and mine is called NES which means “Non Epileptic Seizures” which I find hilarious as the name seems that I am faking it for the last 34 years of my life.

However, after many years of suffering and not understanding what I  was going through, there was a light in the end of the tunnel and I had an alternative explanation. I started seeing a therapist who believes that my seizures are the cause of the lack of understanding my feelings.

I am known to be a very  happy person which is a great thing  I believe, but  I don’t know how to react to the other side of my feelings. My brain has been wired to recognize mainly the happy emotions, and of course life doesn’t work like that and when the down moments occur  I shut down and have a fit.

So through  my therapy  I am learning how to recognize my feelings positive and negative, which is challenging as I had no idea for the last 34 years what is anxiety, sadness or simply just having a bad day .

Now I am learning to recognize all my feelings, and learning  how to not fight them but just let them be instead. So in any bad day I am saying to myself  I am not feeling good but it is OK, I will let it pass and try to understand it instead of questioning or fight it. and I am proud to say through this therapy I have not had a seizure for the last year and half and I have learned a lot about recognizing my emotions.

Recognize emotions

I am going through an experiment suggested by my therapist, and it is mind blowing. I am trying to recognize every feeling I am going through.

First I think I should explain about the reason of this experiment , well I am epileptic, and this disease can vary from one person to another, and mine is called NES which means “Non Epileptic Seizures” which I find hilarious as the name seems that I am faking it for the last 34 years of my life.

However, after many years of suffering and not understanding what I  was going through, there was a light in the end of the tunnel and I had an alternative explanation. I started seeing a therapist who believes that my seizures are the cause of the lack of understanding my feelings.

I am known to be a very  happy person which is a great thing  I believe, but  I don’t know how to react to the other side of my feelings. My brain has been wired to recognize mainly the happy emotions, and of course life doesn’t work like that and when the down moments occur  I shut down and have a fit.

So through  my therapy  I am learning how to recognize my feelings positive and negative, which is challenging as I had no idea for the last 34 years what is anxiety, sadness or simply just having a bad day .

Now I am learning to recognize all my feelings, and learning  how to not fight them but just let them be instead. So in any bad day I am saying to myself  I am not feeling good but it is OK, I will let it pass and try to understand it instead of questioning or fight it. and I am proud to say through this therapy I have not had a seizure for the last year and half and I have learned a lot about recognizing my emotions.

 

 

 

 

are brits racist?

grown_in_britain_logoAre the Brits racist?

I am writing this as being an immigrant who have lived half of my life in the UK. And in my entire existence in the UK, I can easily say  I met only two people that I can count as racist, I think that is a such small number to even take into account.

So I had very little experience of that feeling, but since Brexit there was a talk of racism in the UK, which I have not seen or felt yet. There was tension at one stage that is unquestionable? but I think that is very normal as everyone was in shock and  even to the leavers in my opinion. But now over six months later I live in a confusion. Have the Brits always had that feeling but they hid it so well?

Reason why I am saying that, as I am aware of the fact that t is very famous in the British culture to be politically correct, and the culture as being a fascinating subject for me, I have managed to learn a lot from the British culture, but they will not say what exactly they mean in racist situations, as afraid of offending someone.

Sometimes it can be good thing for sure, and sometimes it is confusing if you are from a different culture as myself. And my question today, is the people who I know (and of course I met some wonderful friends) can some of them be just politically correct? And deep inside do they really want the UK with no foreigners?

Saying that, I have to mention that I lived in the most liberal cities in the UK, Brighton and London. One being the gay capital of the country, so it is all about peace and love,  and the other one is all about Cosmo policy culture; as the amount of non-Brits that live in this city is the majority. So I am not sure I can judge a country just by those facts, so how you get to know the non-liberal cities attitudes towards racism?

 

Would we ever understand the amazing muscle called Brain?

The Amazing Brain

We think we are in charge of our lives, we think we are strong and that we can make rational and irrational decisions, but one thing for sure, we are all very weak and we are all dependent of our health, and especially mental health.

I am suffering from NES, Non Epileptic Seizure which I found hilarious as a name; because it sounds like the person is faking it. But according to experts in the field it happens to people who have had trauma in their lives, war experiences, rape…and so on.

As far as I am concerned, I have had a beautiful childhood, but I was born with a heart condition which leaded to whether an experimental operation or one way to the grave yard, my parents bless them have taken their chances, and I will always be grateful.

The heart operation was done at the age of six months that is as far as my traumatic experience can go, I had my first seizure at the age of four, as I can recall, but being under extensive care after the operation, I have no idea if I had one before that age.

I am glad to be leading a healthy life, apart when the fits kicks in, I seem to change as person, my behavior can be aggressive, my moods can change, my energy level collapses, and the more I am tired the more I know that the fit is closer (which is an amazing thing at least).

The fits themselves can last for 10 min to an hour, but the side effects can last up to 24 hours, where I become a vegetable, I can’t move, look after my child, or function as a person, I am on a pause mode or reboot if we can say so, as all I can do is sleep.

The funny thing is that the more I try to figure out this disease, the more it changes, as if we are playing a game, so far it is winning, but according to my husband or should I say my rock, the man who has loved me with all my diseases, as I had hepatitis C, and he stood by my side through one year experimental treatment until the bitter end, and Epilepsy which has been part of his life too.

He reckons we are winning this battle, as having the fit 7 months and half apart is a huge success to compare with 4 to 5 times a year. I can see his point and actually thanks to him, I have more understanding of this unusual disease. But I am a survivor, I have had few unusual illnesses, and few experimental solutions, but I am alive and grateful for that, actually grateful is not the right term how to describe how happy I am to be alive.

I am weak, I admit it, I can be dependent of the medication, or the preventing medication, as the doctors do not know much about NES, and they should experiment many theories before any concrete results. It seems that my life is experimental so far, but what a ride.

         Prejudice CAN WE EVER GET OVER IT????

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Prejudice has a very negative connotation, and that is for a very good reason, there is   nothing positive about having a preconceived opinion that is not based on a  reason , however prejudice changes from situation to situation, from country to country and from generation to generation.

The fact that being homophobic is seen as narrow-minded in the  21st century ; especially in few countries in the western world, although that  was not reality neither normality few centuries ago.

so that brings me to my point having a prejudice keeps changing  with the time and the space, so being born in a country with a certain culture, education, religion and values will make a person with a certain prejudice , and as long as this person gets educated through books travel or the mysteries of life, this person may change their mind about certain prejudices they had ; though  the issue here is that  they may start having a prejudice against whoever still believes in their old believes, so gaining a new believes is great but do not judge someone  just as they didn’t get to that outcome yet.

So instead of judging the narrow-minded people who still think being racist,sexist or homophobic is bad, we should stop being  still ignorant and have just changed camps from one to side to another.

My opinion  here, we  should learn how to accept differences, these people may learn one day as well as you did, give them a chance and an education.